Why Are We So Horny For The Bad Guy?

“I'm friends with the monster that's under my bed.” 

We hear you, Rihanna but what *is* it about those odious villains, bad boys of the silver screen and too cool grrrl ghouls that get us feeling all hot under our vampire cape? And why do we wanna be more than just friends with those characters specifically designed to give us the, err- willies? 

Was your thirst for the undead first piqued by True Blood? Proud founding member of the Edward Cullen Fan Club? Down for a lil’ From Dawn Til’ Dusk D? You’re not alone: Dazed’s article ‘why are we all so obsessed with sexy vampires?’ lays it out for the converted, the gently intrigued and the mighty confused…

“As figures of abject horror, the vampire personifies taboo. We project all that is condemned upon them so they become emblems of moral decay, perfect to pull us into the world of pain and pleasure, kink and S&M.”

But this isn’t anything new, horror fans across the world have eschewed the sugar-coated charms of conventional pin-ups in favour of the darkly delicious charms of femme fatales such as Elvira, Morticia, and even reimagined Disney villains. Is the lure of the ‘bad boy’ or ‘wicked witch’ because they possess the charisma heroes usually lack? That wily demon who pairs seamless confidence with a perfect pop of peroxide hair definitely wouldn’t match with you on a dating app and un-match an hour later. If you’re reading this Spike, beep us.

Taboo: it’s a key factor here. We’re traditionally pushed towards the hero with a strong jaw and noble selfless aura, as opposed to the character who is more complex, multi-faceted and let’s face it, most likely to be ‘the evil one’. Their depth of personality, especially in comparison to blandly palatable all-round good guys and golden gals is why some of us are naturally, unequivocally drawn to the anti-hero. Speaking of anti-heroes, you’ve been slippin' into our DMs to extoll the virtues of characters including Deadpool, Solid Snake, Villanelle, Hades, Omar, Negan, Regina George, Bellatrix Lestrange and umm, even Yungblud. (It’s the nail varnish, right?)

Fright Night festivities are the perfect time to indulge this fantasy. If you’ve not pulled in a scarily synthetic Smiffy’s wig or got your rocks off in a Leg Avenue bodystocking with *that* smouldering Michael Myers character in the corner; you know someone who has acted upon these fantasies without blame, e.g. ‘me and the wolf man? I wasn’t myself, it was the witches brew, your honour...’ 

We hear you, how in 2020 when IRL do’s are pretty much banned? Think creatively. Switch it up. Get your freak on and indulge in *ahem* a monster mash or two over Facetime. Craft an intricate DIY costume in honour of your fave non-binary baddie. Sext that fiend you fancy. Big on fan fiction? Light up a bouji candle and elaborate on Edward Cullen’s rippling glittering pecs all night long.

Whether you’re spending it solo or locked up with your lover, just don’t forget the HANX lube: it’s vegan, condom and toy compatible. No tricks, all treats. Join the conversation over on our HANX Life forum here.