Autumn: it’s a usually a PSL (pumpkin spiced lattes, don't cha know), kicking leaves, cosy date nights in Gloria’s and PDAs kinda season. We’ve ridden out a scorching summer in lockdown, steered clear of IRL encounters and popped sex bubbles but as we coast past 10pm curfews into a second lockdown, we can’t help but wonder what this means for cuffing season. 👀
First coined in 2013 by Dennis Joseph, creator of Toy Sldrs and shortlisted in 2017 for ‘word of the year’ by Collins dictionary, cuffing season is usually defined as “the period of autumn and winter, when single people are considered likely to seek settled relationships rather than engage in casual affairs.”
With recent developments to the rules for mingling in lockdown -it’s generally a no- confusion around households mixing, the impending frosty weather and outside only meet-ups… you’d be forgiven for thinking that cuffing season this autumn is going to be a little frigid. So, what do the new rules entail? Until Wednesday 2 December, national restrictions state that you must:
- Stay at home, except for specific purposes.
- Avoid meeting people you do not live with, except for specific purposes.
- Close certain businesses and venues.
So, back to video dates and Amazon Watch Parties it is, right? Err, actually if you CBA with swiping left, left, right, HANX fan Saf* is with you.
“After my last long term, very toxic relationship broke down in December, I was optimistic 2020 would bring good sex and pay checks but it’s been a shit show! Some of my friends got really into Bumble and video dating, I just couldn’t feel the vibe… it was all really awkward and actually made me realise I’m better off alone making expanding foam mirrors (thanks flex.mami) and maxing out my Headspace app. Pretty early on, I saw this as the chance to be alone without giving in to the usual pressures of seeing someone/finding a connection and make peace with being single. To be honest, with furlough extended for the meantime and redundancy looming, it’s the most unsexy I’ve felt in a long time and it’s probably a good thing that I’m over dating for the foreseeable. Cuffing season just isn’t a priority.”
Hopeless romantic-ish? Grace* has got your back.
“I started seeing someone online mid-lockdown. There were so many uncertainties like no sex at all, then sex bubbles were a thing which was cool but unrealistic for us as neither of us lived alone but we pushed through. April through to September was just love letters, distanced park walks, Zoom dinners and A LOT of explicit Facetiming: I’ve now just moved in with him! My old flatmates thought what we had didn’t count as an established relationship but I don’t think you can discount a connection because it’s virtual. In all honesty, I’m totally a ‘girlfriend girl’ and if I wasn’t with my BF now, I’d still be looking for someone, the colder months just bring out the cosy in me. Now we get to share lockdown two together properly...”
WBU? With news of a vaccine on the horizon (🤞🤞🤞) and the potential for a relatively 'normal' 2021 on the cards, are you still swiping or giving yourself a festive rest from dating? Let us know over on the HANX Life forum.
*No real names, here. Zero judgement.