In the lead up to our launch this August 24th, we're excited to showcase our Top HANX Power Women.
Here at HANX we're all ears when it comes to positive sexual health, so we're a huge fan of today's Power Woman, Kate Moyle. Kate is a Psychosexual & Couples Psychotherapist, whilst also helping Co-Found Pillow App, a space for couples to engage with each other and intimacy in a mindful, yet playful and fun way. Her ability to manage an app, give expert advice and ultimately help others take control, is inspiring.
Tell us a little bit about yourself and what you do
I work as a Psychosexual & Couples Psychotherapist in Central London, alongside which I am a Partner at Pillow App for couples which I helped Co-Found www.pillow.io . My role as a Psychosexual Therapist is basically to provide people a safe, confidential and judgement-free space to discuss sex, their anxieties about it, problems and concerns with their sex lives and all issues that are in some way impacting their sexuality and their lives. I come from the approach that sexuality (by which I mean our personal relationship with sex, not just partner / gender preference ) is a normal part of human life, but that we treat it very differently to everything else that we do. This creates feelings of shame, embarrassment and builds a culture of taboo and stigma that doesn't help anyone. Inevitably this means when people have difficulties with their sexual lives they don't know where to turn or who to talk to, and that is where the role of Psychosexual Therapy lies.
What is your idea of 'taking control' with regards to your life?
I have to 'take control' of my especially professional life as it involves the wellbeing of others. Organisation & timekeeping is key, especially for me as every day is different so I have to be really on top of my diary, appointments, and admin. It's a balancing act between my personal life and working life too making sure that neither are jeopardised for the other. A huge part of this for me is also that I feel I am encouraging others to take control of their lives every day in my work. Often with problems of such a personal nature they can create feelings of being out of control or that you are not in control of how your body is functioning; and when you can help someone to get back on track to where they want to be it is enormously rewarding.
When was the last time you took control and did something your way?
Starting my own therapy practice and making the decision to go full time was a pretty big step, and in terms of taking control you have to be prepared to take the leap and see where it goes and for the hard work that goes with that. As a therapist you are always learning too so that involves big decision making about the direction you want to take, which is also a huge personal investment. In general though every therapist I have met has come to where they are via their own route and experiences, so I think I have got to where I am my own way, but importantly with incredible ongoing support from others.
What motivational mantra do you live by?
Kindness & thoughtfulness are invaluable.
One hundred times yes.